You all know I'm a Strictly addict but if someone doesn't soon kill Bruce Forsyth I'll have to hire a hit man, I'm not allowed to use the "C" word in our house but Bruce Forsyth is a C**T with a capital C, he ruins the show for me, well almost anyway, I hope Andrew Castle stays in for while but only because I want to shag his partner Ola Jordan, did you see what she was almost wearing the other week? fucking ell, I wish I could dance, every week I tune in and imagine that it's me up there with some old tart on me arm doing the Gay Gordon, that's a dance by the way, it has nothing to do with our illustrious leader, not fucking much.